The Value of Being Perfectly Imperfect

By Cynthia Cummings-Walker

My 11-year-old granddaughter was given some coins for a game she won. As she looked at the quarters she realized that one was very different from the others. The face of the quarter depicted George Washington, as usual, yet the back looked unique.

My granddaughter decided to do some research on Coin websites. She discovered that quarters, like the one she had, could be worth as much as $1,000.00. However, the valuable quarter had to have a specific defect which would make it valuable.

My granddaughter’s coin was perfectly shiny but did not have a flaw. Therefore, it was only worth the 25 cents that average quarters are valued. A coin having a specific defect is what makes it so valuable. It had to be imperfectly perfect.

The Illusion of Perfection

In today’s society, perfection appears to be the goal as a mark of achievement or value. Men and women will have all kinds of cosmetic procedures performed in order to have the perfect face and body. Some have died or are disfigured as a result of underqualified, or unqualified surgeons.

Celebrities themselves have admitted that they don’t really look like their professional photos. Makeup, lighting, editing, and filters create the mirage of beautiful, perfect, beings. It is all a façade. If actors and models were so perfect there would be no need for the entertainment industry to use extras like body doubles, and hand models.

The Value of Imperfection

Years ago there was a mold that all models had to fit into. They had to be extremely thin and as perfect looking as possible. Sometime later, women came along who refused to change what seemed to be imperfections so that they could become top models.

Cindy Crawford refused to have her facial mole removed. Margot Hemmingway refused to have the gap in her teeth corrected. Those imperfections are what caused them to stand out in the industry and they became supermodels.

Today, the standards in the entertainment industry have changed because those who do not fit into a “model mold” are the ones sought after. There are prominent celebrities and models who would not have had a chance in the past.

Nowadays models can have vitiligo, facial scars, a missing limb, ambulism and all kinds of physical differences that make them interesting and different. People today want uniqueness, not uniformity.

Who Are you Trying to Please?

So many people are discontented with their physical appearance. If their hair is curly, they want it straight. If their skin color is dark they want to lighten it. If their skin color is light they want to darken it. Some want medical procedures to shrink an area, while others want medical procedures to enlarge something.

I am certainly not attempting to judge how people feel about themselves. My concern is for those who are preoccupied with physical perfection as though it is the gateway to success and happiness.

Plenty of people who look perfect in face and body have turned to illegal drugs or even suicide because they are so unhappy. Their inner self is not in alignment with their outward appearance.

Many people will invest all kinds of money in how they look and what they wear yet are bankrupt in terms of cultivating an inner beauty.

“Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within,….which is so precious to God.” 1 Peter 3:3–4 (NLT)

Cultivating inner beauty, integrity and character will take a person much further in life than a pretty face with a nasty attitude. “As a ring of gold in a swine’s snout So is a beautiful woman who lacks discretion.” Proverbs 11:22 (NASB)

Embrace being Perfectly Imperfect

“Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness;…” God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. God blessed them;…” Genesis 1:26–28a (NASB)

Everything and everyone God created is perfect because we are created in His image and likeness regardless of any “imperfections” we may see in ourselves or others.

I do not believe that God created anyone “ugly”. As the saying goes: “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.” Standards of beauty are generally determined within ethnicities, cultures, or society; all designed and created by God.

People can reject someone based on their own personal reasons or prejudices, yet no one can stop God’s plan for your life. Embrace who you are because you know whose you are. Do the best you can with what you have to work with. Improve what you can and embrace the rest.

Investing time in developing and maintaining a close relationship with the Lord has earthy benefits and eternal rewards. When you trust God by believing what He says in His word, the Bible, your life will be filled with thanksgiving, praise, and gratitude for the life He has given you, imperfections, and all.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight.” Proverbs 3:5–6 (NASB)

Question for Reflection: Have you ever considered this?:

“For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.” John 3:16 (NASB)

Believe. Pray. Read the Bible. Trust. Obey

The Miracle of an Ordinary Day

When we wake up in the morning, we never know what a day will bring. Someone didn’t even wake up.

On any given day someone has a heart attack, an upsetting diagnosis, serious accident or injury, a job eliminated, a divorce finalized, a sudden death, an important relationship ended, victim of a crime.

These things happen to someone somewhere every day. In light of all that can happen, when we live through an ordinary day without a personal catastrophe, or knowing about one, that is a miracle in itself.

A Miracle

One day it dawned on me that I am thankful for what I see. Am I thanking God for what didn’t happen?

I love flower gardening and grow lots of flowers. One day I was weeding and pruning flowers that are in front of the wooded area in back of my house. When finished, I decided to prune the holly bushes.

As the branches fell to the ground, I would pick them up and place them in a bag. When I got to the last bush, as I reached down to pick up branches, my hand went across something solid under the bush. When I looked to see what it was, there was a huge copperhead snake curled under the bush.

I was terrified. I couldn’t believe it. The snake had every opportunity to sink its teeth into my neck or face, yet the Lord protected me from the unseen danger. Copperheads are the type of snakes that are most likely to bite. In North Carolina there are more copperhead bites than all other snake bites combined.

It was a miracle.

Story time

A person’s alarm clock did not go off as scheduled which made her late for work. Because she was late, she was unable to have coffee with some co-workers she enjoyed starting off the workday with. For lunch she went to a restaurant. It took what seemed like forever to get her meal. Late again.

Nothing was going right that day. When she got home she was going to relax and soak her aching feet. As soon as she was getting ready to plug in the foot massager, the power went off in the house.

She couldn’t believe how rotten her day had been. She prayed and asked God why He would allow almost everything to go wrong when she had not neglected to pray for a good day.

The Lord replied: “You overslept because there was a reckless, speeding driver that was going to crash into someone. If you had been on the road at that time it could have been you.

You weren’t able to have coffee with co-workers because the conversation was a lot of gossip and complaint about the company you work for and I didn’t want you to become embroiled in the controversy ahead.

Your lunch was delayed because the chef was sneezing and not feeling well. Another chef had to be called to replace him. This caused a delay in meal preparation which prevented you from getting sick from possibly contaminated food.

I know you really wanted to have a nice foot soak, however, there was a short in the wiring. If you had been able to plug it in you would have been electrocuted.”

A Miracle.

So many times, we don’t understand what is going on behind the scenes. We blame God for not answering our prayers when He is answering them. A prayer for safety. A prayer for job security. A prayer for health.

1 Thessalonians 5:17-18 (KJV)

“Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.”

Christians are to trust God and be thankful in every situation. He knows and does what is best whether we understand it or not. I’ve learned to be thankful for the miracles God has performed in my life even though I can’t specifically say what some are.

Miracles are not always manifested in spectacular ways. They can happen during an ordinary day in what didn’t happen.

Question for Reflection:

Are you thankful in every situation, or quick to complain and blame?

Is God Punishing Me?

By Cynthia Cummings-Walker

As I pondered the diagnosis, and what I had just been told, the pain of my thoughts was like a heated blade stabbing through my very heart and soul. Suddenly I heard sounds of loud, heart wrenching wails filling the air. I looked around to see who it was. There was no one else there. It was me.

The all-encompassing pain I felt from this living nightmare was just too much to bear. Every bit of physical strength I had drained out of my body. I felt weak, and slowly slid to the floor. Words cannot express the depth of pain and anguish that ripped at my very soul as images of Rachel suffering for months, without relief, swirled around in my head.

Through bitter tears I wondered, how could God be a loving, merciful God and allow something so awful to happen? Perhaps it wasn’t God’s fault. What if it was me?

Was I Being Punished for Something?

I couldn’t help but wonder if this torture was some kind of punishment from God for something I had done. I started trying to remember everything I had ever done wrong to see if anything warranted this level of retribution from God. I was far from perfect but couldn’t pinpoint anything.

Fast forwarding through my life, perhaps I had forgotten about something. No, nothing there either. I couldn’t remember anything drastic enough to cause what seemed to be severe punishment. No matter how irrational my thought process was, that is how I felt then, before I knew better.

Every day, people all over the world die, get in accidents, receive a devastating diagnosis, get betrayed, abandoned by someone they love; or lose everything they have. Death. Abuses. Tragedy. Evil. All are a part of life.

No matter who you are, where you live, or what you have, misfortune will come knocking at your door at some point. One thing that may be easy to forget is that each person who dies is an individual, not just one of many. They have families and loved ones who suffer and grieve.

Perspective Matters

I had to admit that when catastrophes befall others, I don’t assume that God is punishing them. So why, when something horrendous happens to someone personally, they may think it is a punishment from God? Even if I had done something terrible, God still would not hurt someone else to punish the perpetrator, me.

Perspective determines how a person will feel and act on what’s happening in their life. Two people can look at the same situation and see it entirely differently. In this case we are considering responses to tragedy and loss.

Let’s say that there is a drinking glass on a table that has liquid in it to the middle of the glass. Some people see the glass as half full, while others see it as half empty. Some people go through life with a half empty glass as a victim. While the ones who see the glass half full will be more positive about life and are more likely to live as a victor.

I understand that during a crisis a person can be blindsided by the pain. They don’t want to think about what good can come out of their situation. They just want things back the way they used to be no matter how it was.

Self-Induced Misery is Not Punishment

There is no need for God to punish a person who makes perpetually foolish decisions. The consequences of their actions cause misery that is self-induced. When a person fails to take personal responsibility for bad decisions, it is easier to blame someone else, or claim that God is punishing them.

I’ve heard some people’s family members say that God is punishing them by taking their loved one away. Not true. For instance, if a person chooses to be drug or alcohol addicted, has reckless behaviors or takes their own life, that is a consequence of personal choice.

My heart goes out to those who suffer because of these heart wrenching situations. I know they don’t want to blame the dead. God isn’t to blame either. God gives us all free will to live life as we please.

We can make decisions that benefit us, or ones that are detrimental. Even when a loved one passes away from something out of their control, that is not God punishing anyone. People get sick and die. Everyone is going to die one day. No one gets out of here alive.

The more I thought about it, prayed, and studied the scriptures, I realized that God does not punish the innocent for the actions of the guilty.

We Reap What We Sow

If God wanted to punish me, He had plenty of ways He could do it directly. God is a God of justice. It would be unjust for Him to punish the innocent for the actions of the guilty. Galatians 6:7 (NLT) “Don’t be misled—you cannot mock the justice of God. You will always harvest what you plant.”

In other words, we all will reap what we have sown, personally. My heart goes out to those who have culpability in situations that have caused great pain and regret. We can’t turn back the hands of time and change what happened. What can be done is to confess, repent, and learn from it.

God’s Objective is to Save, Not Punish

God is loving, merciful and forgiving. Everything He does is right, and for our good. We can’t tell God how to be God any more than our toddler can tell us how to be a parent. None of us has done everything right. We all fall short. We must trust God because He is God. Our Sovereign, Omniscient, Omnipotent Lord.

When someone is grieving, the focus tends to be on what is lost, instead of acknowledging and appreciating what remains. It takes time, yet it will come if the person desires it. Know and believe Scripture: “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” Romans 8:28 (NLT)

Consider This

“For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.” John 3:16 (NASB)

Lessons From a Bird: Being Content with God’s Provision

By Cynthia Cummings-Walker

For a couple of days, a beautiful bright red cardinal kept flying into my window that faces the patio. I didn’t know why and was concerned that it would injure itself. After a couple of days I realized that the bird was trying to fly to the red flowering Canna plant I have just inside that window.

The bird completely ignored the birdfeeders, birdbath, and urns of beautiful flowers blooming all around the patio. None of that seemed to matter. The bird was determined to get to the Canna through that window, although it was closed.

The Cardinal did not realize that in being outside, it had the freedom to fly anywhere it wanted to go. It could travel to places where it could enjoy a variety of flowers and food. Being around other birds the Cardinal could find a mate.

Many people are like the Cardinal. The Lord has provided us with everything we need, and much of what we desire. When lust for something that looks more appealing sets in, we may become dissatisfied, ignoring what we have and go after that which is unreachable. Sometimes to our own detriment.

In Genesis chapters 2 and 3 is the biblical account of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. God had provided the most beautiful garden that anyone could possibly imagine. Adam and Eve did not have to plant anything nor toil to maintain its beauty. There were no weeds. A mist came up from the ground to water it. There was little to do except enjoy it.

The trees there were exceptionally lush and stunning to look at and countless fruit trees to eat from. There was only one restriction. God told Adam and Eve they could eat fruit from any tree in the garden, except one. It was the tree of the knowledge of good and evil located in the middle of the garden.

Adam and Eve had a close and personal relationship with God. They lived in a beautiful, perfect environment. What more could they want?

One day Satan approached Eve and asked her why she was not eating from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Eve said that God told them they could not eat from that tree. If they ate from it they would surely die.

Satan told Eve that what God said was not true and if they ate from the tree they would not surely die. He said God was restricting them from that tree because if they ate from it their eyes would be opened and they would be like God, knowing good and evil.

Eve was tempted to disobey God, blinded by the lust for something that was forbidden. She erroneously felt that God was withholding something better than she already had. Eve ignored the lush and beautiful garden she lived in and focused on what she was closed out from having.

It was like the Cardinal wanting to get to the Canna. Eve succumbed to the temptation and ate a piece of fruit from the forbidden tree and gave some to Adam. This was a disastrous decision. It probably took less than a minute to make, yet one that brought irreparable damage to Adam and Eve and their relationship with God.

The result of their disobedience destroyed their entire way of life. The penalty for Adam and Eve’s disobedience caused God to remove them from the garden and banned them from ever returning.

The far-reaching consequences were that Adam would have to work by the sweat of his brow for the rest of his life. Eve would have to suffer labor pains in childbirth. Their son Cain would kill their other son Abel. Of course, they had no idea of the price they would have to pay for being ungrateful and disobedient. Do we?

Things may look tempting and good from the outside looking in. The Master Gardener has a reason for closing a door or window. Even though the Cardinal was intent on entering my home for the flowering plant through the window, I restricted its entry and the window remained closed.

Unbeknownst to the bird, if it had managed to get inside, it would be paying a high price. It’s freedom to enjoy all of nature would be gone, and it would be restricted to one flower in an atmosphere which is not conducive to the bird’s intended purpose, nor its survival.

2 LESSONS TO BE LEARNED FROM THE CARDINAL

In life, learn to be content with God’s provisions and enjoy what you currently have. The door or window may be closed for a reason. When the Lord has something for you, you will have access to it in God’s time. Pray and wait.
Trust God. He is good. Everything the Lord does is right and done for our good. God has reasons for restrictions. Some things may be detrimental to us, or it is just not the right time. If we try to force our way in, that can cause self-induced misery, or worse.

As for the Cardinal, it kept flying into the window until I realized why the bird was doing it and moved the Canna to another spot where the bird could not see it. The Cardinal then refocused and enjoyed the provisions outside where it was. Once it is consistently warm outside at night, I will put the Cannas outside and the Cardinal can enjoy them then.

Disaster can be borne out of haste. Good things come to those who wait.

Have you ever made a decision in haste and regretted it?

Do you, when God does not answer a prayer the way you want Him to, patiently wait, trusting that He knows what is best?